The Golden Rule

After the kids were in bed I sat down at the computer in a reflective and contemplative mood. William pushed Marie this evening resulting in a huge bruise on her forehead. So what else is new, you ask? That is the point. It isn’t new. It is old. Extremely old. Her tell-tale William-just-hurt-me-AGAIN scream is old. Very. Old.

Time-out? Doesn’t stop him.

Toys taken away? He has too many to care.

There I sat at the computer with a prayer in my heart. What on earth can I do with this child?

And here is the answer.

Here is this baby and he refuses to eat his solid food. ("Solid" in this case is a euphemism for "squishy.") Are you a failure as a parent? Is he a failure as a baby? Is the pediatrician a failure as a pediatrician? Would the baby rather have a hot pastrami sandwich? This brings us to the primary rule of baby raising, which is the solution to this and all subsequent problems. This rule must be followed faithfully, and practiced regularly, and you should make it a habit to repeat it to yourself ten times a day. It is the “Golden Rule” of raising babies. LIE. Lie to your mother, lie to your sisters and aunts, and above all, lie to all the other mothers you meet on the street. When a newer mother than you asks for your help. tell her you never had the least trouble. Your baby just loved his mashed bananas on the first try.

Elinor Goulding Smith, The Complete Book of Absolutely Perfect Baby and Child Care (1957)

There you have it. Let me give it a go.

My dear sweet loving William is the best big brother Marie could ask for. He loves to give her hugs and kisses. He is so gentle with her. His favorite thing to do is to share his toys with her. He loves it when she comes in his room and wrecks his train.

Sibling rivalry? Nah. Never heard of it.