After we had Marie I immediately felt very strongly about adding a 3rd child to our family. Not so much a feeling that I need to have a baby right away, but rather, the feeling that I would definitely be having another one .... eventually.
Over the past 20 months, as I have struggled with Marie on so many levels, I have often reflected on the "I know I am going to have another one" feeling. I have had days when I did not want another child. Ever. No amount of newborn squishy-ness could erase the memories of what it is really like to have an infant in the home. It was on those days that I wanted to just ingnore those promptings. I have also had the days when I know I can do this. It is hard, but I am woman, hear me roar! Bring on the kids! At first, the bad days were much more frequent than the good days. Slowly but surely, the tides are turning.
I can actually look at baby clothes without getting a wave of exhaustion.
The smell of spit up doesn't make me nauseous.
Newborns make me smile again.
So that "eventually" is getting closer to becoming a reality and typing that isn't causing me anxiety. Improvement.
Let's reiterate that this is not an announcement. I am not pregnant.
But if I were, I would be OK with that. That is my point.
Oh, and to share this lovely entry from Sarah at Clover Lane. It was this post that sparked this train of thought in the first place. Read it. Enjoy it.
Happy Tuesday!
2 comments:
Check this out: I am baby hungry for another baby and I haven't even gotten THIS baby out yet! How's that for messed up?
I know exactly what you mean! I know there will be a third, but have no idea when I'll allow that to happen!! I'm so thrilled for you that your tides are turning. I get a glimpse of that every now and then. The tide comes in... and then the tides goes out. :)
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